At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
