I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
