I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
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