sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
