Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
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