I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
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