You just made me feel so damn special
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
