why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Randomize
