I'm drive I can fine osifer
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Randomize
