Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
Randomize