I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
