Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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