I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
