Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
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