but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
What drink are we having for lunch?
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
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