i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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