He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
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