First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
I could have mohawked her pubes.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Randomize
