Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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