She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
