wakey wakey hands off snakey
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
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