I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize