I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
