Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
