Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
My mom asked what the mark on my neck was - I told her I burned it with a straightener.
She believed that the monsterous hickey on your neck was a burn?
well, not really. but then i reminded her that my sister has yet to take that pregnancy test and she conviniently forgot about my hickey
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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