The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
