Its about making memories worth repressing
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
