she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
That reminds me...we need to get swords
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
