i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize