Where did you get a picture of my penis
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize