you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
