think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
