Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
Randomize
