Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
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