So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
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