if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
I'm like, not good at living.
Randomize
