Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize
