There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
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