capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize