hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Randomize