The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
3 2 1 whiskey
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
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