too bad you live with your parents still
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Randomize
