her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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