god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
