I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
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