even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
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