we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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