There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
we're making bets on your personal life
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
