I could have mohawked her pubes.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Randomize
