The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
BRING THE BAGELS
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
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