we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
