Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
